Trigger Warning: This post discusses narcissistic behavior and emotional manipulation
My Loves, We Need to Talk…
Oh, sisters, grab your crystals and settle in with your favorite cup of tea, because today we’re diving deep into some heavy but necessary truth-telling. I’ve been sitting with this energy for days, trying to process what just happened, and I know in my soul that sharing this will help someone who might be going through the same thing.
The Universe’s Latest Plot Twist
So here’s what happened (and yes, I’m getting vulnerable with you all because that’s how we heal together). After months of rediscovering my joy, stepping into my power, and yes, finally allowing myself to feel desired again by someone new, my narcissistic ex decided to make an unexpected appearance in my story. And what he said next literally made my jaw drop.
He compared me to a discarded toy that he suddenly wanted back because someone else was playing with it. Yes, you read that right, beautiful souls—a TOY.
The Narcissist’s Playbook: Why This Happens
Let me break down what’s really happening here, because understanding is power:
1. The Supply and Demand Effect When a narcissist sees their former partner receiving attention from someone new, it triggers what psychologists call “narcissistic injury.” They suddenly realize their former source of emotional supply is now potentially feeding someone else’s soul instead of theirs.
2. The Ownership Mentality Even though they chose to discard us (in my case, years of emotional neglect), narcissists never truly let go of what they consider their “possessions.” They keep us in their emotional inventory, always believing they can reclaim us when it suits them.
3. The Competition Trigger Here’s the wild part – it’s not actually about wanting us back. It’s about not wanting anyone else to have us. It’s about control, power, and their fragile ego being threatened.
Signs You’re Experiencing This Pattern
- Sudden increased contact after periods of silence
- Love bombing or attempts to remind you of “good times”
- Expressing jealousy about your new relationships
- Making claims about “changing” or “realizing what they lost”
- Attempting to sabotage your new connections
- Using mutual friends or children to gather information
Your Spiritual Toolbox for Protection
My beautiful warriors, here’s what I want you to do if this happens to you:
1. Ground Yourself
- Place your feet firmly on the earth
- Take deep breaths
- Remember who you are NOW, not who you were THEN
- Hold your favorite crystal (I’ve been clutching my black tourmaline like it’s my job!)
2. Set Energetic Boundaries
- Visualize a golden light surrounding you
- Repeat this mantra: “I am protected, I am whole, I choose my path”
- Limit contact to necessary communications only
- Document all interactions for legal protection
3. Trust Your Intuition Remember how your body feels when they contact you. That knot in your stomach? That’s your intuition speaking. Listen to her – she knows.
The Deeper Truth
Here’s what I want you to really understand, my loves: This behavior isn’t about love. It’s about possession. When my ex compared me to a toy, he revealed the truth about how he sees relationships – as objects to possess rather than connections to nurture.
Your Homework (Because Growth is Sacred Work)
- Journal Prompt: “How do I feel when my ex tries to re-enter my space? What does my body tell me?”
- Mirror Work: Stand before your mirror and declare: “I am not an object to be possessed. I am a divine being worthy of real love.”
- Energy Clearing: Sage your space, take a salt bath, or do whatever ritual helps you clear heavy energy.
Final Words of Wisdom
Remember this, beautiful souls: You are not a toy on a shelf. You are not something to be picked up and discarded at someone else’s whim. You are a magnificent, sovereign being who deserves to be cherished, not possessed.
To the man who’s showing me what real attention feels like – thank you for reminding me what it feels like to be seen.
To my ex, who’s suddenly interested – thank you for the clarity. The universe has perfect timing in showing us exactly what we’ve outgrown.
And to all of you walking this path of healing – I see you, I honor you, and I’m right here walking beside you.
Drop a 💫 in the comments if you’ve experienced something similar, or share your own healing journey. Let’s hold space for each other.
With so much love and protective energy,
Sheena Diane
P.S. Remember to sage your social media accounts too, loves. Sometimes the most toxic energy comes through our screens! 🧚♀️✨